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CD #11
00:00:09,808 --> 00:00:11,144 Okay, so check this out.
2
00:00:11,725 --> 00:00:14,331 Let's say a space alien
landed in my own town.
3
00:00:14,888 --> 00:00:17,721 If he was 16 years old,
he would go to my high school.
4
00:00:17,875 --> 00:00:20,600 and let's face it,
his life would probably suck.
5
00:00:20,875 --> 00:00:24,428 Everyone would make fun
of his giant head and his big bug eyes.
6
00:00:25,092 --> 00:00:26,657 He'd be an outcast, a loner.
7
00:00:27,109 --> 00:00:28,237 Definitely a virgin.
8
00:00:29,033 --> 00:00:30,712 There'd be nothing
he could do about it,
9
00:00:30,834 --> 00:00:33,469 except wait for his spaceship
to take him home.
10
00:00:34,478 --> 00:00:35,841 I didn't have a spaceship.
11
00:00:35,966 --> 00:00:38,973 And each year of high school
was worst than the last.
12
00:00:39,253 --> 00:00:41,353 But all of that was about to change.
13
00:00:41,872 --> 00:00:43,872 Because right before my junior year,
14
00:00:43,965 --> 00:00:45,272 I got my braces off.
15
00:00:45,708 --> 00:00:47,985
You're gonna need to stop
licking your teeth like that,
16
00:00:48,760 --> 00:00:50,050
it's distracting to look at.
17
00:00:50,177 --> 00:00:52,006
I just can't get enough
of how this feels,
18
00:00:52,128 --> 00:00:53,910
I mean, they're really gone.
19
00:00:54,250 --> 00:00:55,680
Yeah, well, open up.
20
00:00:57,067 --> 00:00:59,584
We don't need any hash browns
cutting our million dollar smile.
21
00:00:59,585 --> 00:01:00,901 This is my Mom.
22
00:01:01,638 --> 00:01:05,315 Three years earlier,
she resigned as President of the PTA,
23
00:01:05,451 --> 00:01:08,060 because she wanted to focus
on normalizing me.
24
00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:11,263 Even though I didn't always think
she knew what she was doing,
25
00:01:11,700 --> 00:01:13,477 sometimes, I kind of got cut up.
26
00:01:16,025 --> 00:01:17,949
If I was a girl of your age...
27
00:01:19,187 --> 00:01:20,590
Gary, you know what?
28
00:01:21,001 --> 00:01:23,048
I should drive him down to Milwaukee.
29
00:01:23,244 --> 00:01:25,131
Have him visit
one of those modeling agencies.
30
00:01:25,548 --> 00:01:27,608
- Really?
- That's not a bad idea, Franny,
31
00:01:28,700 --> 00:01:30,159
you know they take all kinds.
32
00:01:30,901 --> 00:01:34,499
Stan Parker's kid just did a print ad
for Home Depot.
33
00:01:35,107 --> 00:01:36,498
That's a year of college.
34
00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:38,935 My Dad had a good job.
35
00:01:39,006 --> 00:01:42,021 But he was always looking
for a new way to make money.
36
00:01:42,579 --> 00:01:45,913 Which is why we were breeding
6 alpacas in our backyard.
37
00:01:47,390 --> 00:01:48,390
Okay, hon.
38
00:01:48,886 --> 00:01:49,886
Here you go.
39
00:01:52,293 --> 00:01:53,293
Look at you.
40
00:01:53,691 --> 00:01:56,081
This is gonna be your year.
41
00:01:57,943 --> 00:02:00,616 The only thing crazier than my mom
pumping me up like that
42
00:02:00,738 --> 00:02:02,349 was the fact that I believed it.
43
00:02:02,944 --> 00:02:05,727 But that's what made
the dates between us so special.
44
00:02:05,849 --> 00:02:07,416
Justin, you're doing it again.
45
00:02:07,538 --> 00:02:08,538
I was?
46
00:02:08,672 --> 00:02:10,695
You're doing it like all the time,
by the way.
47
00:02:11,742 --> 00:02:13,507 This is my little sister Claire.
48
00:02:13,961 --> 00:02:16,989 My Mom says part of my job
is to make sure she's doing okay.
49
00:02:17,148 --> 00:02:18,693
Like I don't have enough to deal with.
